Thai Adoption Newsletter Vol. 4, Number 4
November 2002
Well, the September newsletter turned into a November
newsletter... so you can see what kind of summer/fall we've had here in the
Higginbotham household.
Due to the length of time transpiring between
newsletters, there's a ton of Community Notes this month - lots of new members
and new arrivals in particular. I hope you'll find it heartwarming to read
about so many families and children joining our community! Don't miss the
"requests/inquiries" section for some important notes from your
fellow adoptive families. Also, I know you'll enjoy a great article on travel
with siblings from a-mom Gwen Shuster-Haynes, info about the upcoming Thai
Family Reunion, shopping tips, recipes, and more!
Your feedback and ideas are always welcome at
urghiggi@yahoo.com.
Julie Higginbotham
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TIPS FOR ADOPTION TRAVEL WITH
OLDER SIBLINGS IN TOW
By Gwen Shuster-Haynes (d-base member and mom to one bio
and three adopted children)
We did not take our 8-year-old daughter to Nepal when we
adopted her brother Bobby. Nepal's adoptions, at that time, did not run on any
set timetable, and our initial referral for Bobby began with "First you
fly from Kathmandu to Jomoson where you rent ponies..." But I always
wondered if they might have "clicked" as siblings faster if Alexis
had not felt left out when we flew halfway around the globe to bring her
brother home.
When we sent our dossier to Bangkok we had three
children: Alexis (12), Bobby (5), and Sarah (3), and I wanted more than
anything to take them to Bangkok for the beginning of their new brother Andy's
adoption. I had different reasons for taking each child. Alexis is a birth
child who often commented that adopted kids are the luckiest kids in the world.
I wanted her to see the bittersweet aspects of an adopted child's world. I
wanted Bobby to see another Asian country before he returned to Nepal. I
thought he could appreciate the beauty of Thailand and the diversity of its
people before witnessing the greater contrast between rich and poor in Nepal.
Sarah (adopted domestically) craves a birthmother who has disappeared from our
lives. I wanted her to realize that not all adopted children meet their birthmothers.
Should you take your kids? As a parent it's dangerous to have so many expectations, but
the reasons listed above were a driving motivator for me as I contemplated
financing a trip with five going to Thailand and six coming home. Before you plan
the trip as a family, consider your own motivations, as well as the age of your
children and their innate temperaments. Some children travel well-it's one of
the few common characteristics of my four-others don't like a cross-town drive.
Even with a wonderful kid's backpack filled with diversions, traffic in Bangkok
moves at a glacial pace. You will spend hours in traffic; can your kids handle
it?
Think about your children's personalities. Will envy be a
big deal for the child(ren) being dethroned? Would you rather face that battle
on home turf? Not all siblings fall in love with each other at first sight. No
matter how much you say "mom's heart grows bigger so she can love
everyone," the reality is that mom doesn't sprout an extra set of arms for
hugs or have her lap automatically increase enough to nestle everyone.
Would you like extra bonding time with your Thai child,
without the responsibility of caring for other child(ren) at the same time?
With both of my Asian sons, I've had to stay behind in their home countries to
finish paperwork while the rest of the family returned to the U.S. Each time
I've experienced a few bouts of loneliness, but as their mother I would not
trade that one-on-one time for anything in the world. I look on each of those
unplanned beginnings as gifts from God. I was in a far away country with no
dinners to cook, soccer team practices, violin lessons, church committees, etc.
Andy did not pick me as his favorite parent when we met. He bonded with both
Mark and Alexis first, but then he had a week with just Mom. By not taking your
other children you gain this experience. Taking everyone along automatically
involves a tradeoff, and only you can determine how the equation will work best
for your family. In our case we determined that the family trip was the way to
go, but this doesn't mean it will be the correct solution for every family.
Tips for choosing companions Our dossier for a special needs son sat in Bangkok for over
two years before we were matched. Mark and I knew we would need help on the
trip. During the long wait, we placed a glass jar in the kitchen and began
saving our change for a plane ticket for poppa, because my mother would only
consider coming along if my dad were with her. Unfortunately health concerns
ultimately prevented my parents from traveling with us, but we asked Kara, a
high school senior and our children's favorite babysitter, if she would come
along to help with Alexis, Bobby, and Sarah while we worked to incorporate Andy
into our family.
Since Alexis's arrival we have taken different teenagers
along as helpers on five different trips. I cannot stress enough how much more
enjoyable our Thai trip was with Kara along. We also hired Kwan and Miss Oh
(two adoption guides recommended by families from the thailandadopt listserv),
and we had a good friend who lived in Bangkok. It took this entire quartet of
helpers to make everything happen.
When you start thinking about a helper in Thailand, don't
accept the first person that volunteers. Consider what you are offering and
what you expect before you make your choice. Do you want someone to play with
the existing sibs while you get to meet your new child? Are you thinking in
terms of an extra set of hands while everyone is out as a group? Do you want
someone who can take kids to the pool while you finish up paperwork?
We had many adults volunteer to travel with us, but we
like seeing the world through the eyes of a teenager. Who else notices what
color of laces are in tennis shoes? Each teen has had wonderful strengths. (My
college athlete niece schlepped
suitcases like they were marshmallows and led endless rounds of singing
"Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.") For teens, we offer the plane
trip, lodging, and meals along with all the sightseeing they can handle. We are
specific about what we expect.
Our chat with Kara and her parents went like this:
"We don't know completely what to expect. But Kara's main job will be to
help the oldest three kids feel comfortable and special while we get to know
Andy. This means little things like being in charge of the 'kid's backpack'
which we'll help you stock with games, toys, or surprises. Each day you'll need
to make sure there are snacks and juice boxes or water bottles." That
makes Kara sound like a packhorse! And in some ways she was. She enjoyed using
the 7-11 type store in the Centre Point apartment building to find snacks.
We also made it clear before Kara came along that we
would want her to sometimes watch the children on her own while Mark and I got
away for a quiet dinner together, and that each person would be able to pick
out one or two preferred tourist sites or activities that we would all visit
together.
Your helper will also have questions about sleeping
arrangements. Before you go, think about how much privacy you and your helper
will need. The Centre Point Apartments gave us plenty of space; when we took
side trips to Hua Hin, we used two connecting rooms. Kara shared a bedroom with
Alexis, and as they grew more comfortable with our Bangkok location, we were
able to give them the freedom to visit the Central Department store four or
five blocks down the street to pick up groceries and indulge in
window-shopping.
Finally, if you're bringing more than one existing child,
make sure your helper doesn't play favorites. That had always been Kara's
greatest strength. Alexis and Kara bought Japanese magazines in the Tokyo
airport and had a blast looking at the fashions. Kara played Power Rangers and
a hundred variations of fantasy games with Bobby, and did Sarah's hair in
pigtails and ponytails to keep her thick mop off her shoulders. The converse of
this statement is, don't bring someone who will spend too much time going ga-ga
over your new addition. If they do, pull them aside and say, "I'm so
thrilled that you are as enchanted with xxxx as we are, but for the time in
Thailand what I really need is xxxxxx."
What to pack with kids Use your waiting time for a referral/approval to think about
packing lists and activities. Doodle separate lists of what to bring,
categorized by "plane time," "office time," etc. The
biggest hit on our plane rides were pads of black paper and gel pens.
Thailand is a kid-friendly place and the weather is
temperate, so you won't need to lug much warm clothing. If you travel in winter
from a cold climate, see if someone will take your coats from you at your
departure airport and return them when you come home. We left Denver during a
below-freezing night. Kara's parents insisted that they "store" our
coats, gloves, etc. You can't believe how wonderful it was to not have to deal
with those extras while in Bangkok.
Pack one sweatshirt or sweater for each child for the
plane (and know that your child probably won't need it). If you're taking
girls, explain why bare shoulders and short shorts are inappropriate. Sarah
wore dresses every day, but she's the youngest in a long line of girl cousins
and I was able to pack all summer dresses that covered her shoulders. The teens
wore solid-colored T-shirts. (On the beach they eagerly showed off their
shoulders!) I dressed the boys in shorts and polo/T shirt tops. Everyone
brought one "church" outfit for the DPW interview.
To make packing and dressing easy, pack an entire
"kid outfit" in a gallon food bag. With the top, shorts, underwear
and socks in a gallon food bag, you can squeeze all of the air out of it and
gain extra packing space while allowing the kids to dress themselves. This
technique also makes packing and unpacking a snap. If your itinerary includes
overnights, see if you can use backpacks for those and store your suitcases at
your main hotel or apartment.
Plan to pack light and do laundry. Our Centre Point
apartment kitchen had an appliance that could wash and dry a small load of
clothes. We kept the machine fairly busy with kids' clothes. I took over some
laundry supplies, but bought more in the 7-11 off the lobby. I also used the
apartments' laundry/pressing service for good grownup clothing.
Pack some comfort foods and basic medicines. We always
bring peanut butter, etc., for our oldest who is a picky eater. Since we'd be
gone over Christmas I also bubble-wrapped some candy canes etc. You can easily
buy prescription drugs and supplies in Bangkok, but it is often easier to bring
the basics from home. Purchasing diaper rash ointment took quite awhile. Oh,
how I'd wished I'd just bought some here in Denver!
Finally, give some thought to how you will carry
donations. Airlines have changed their baggage rules so that some large
suitcases that were once free now incur an extra fee. Call your carrier and
know how much space you have to work with. We took two bags per individual, BUT
most of them were filled with sandals, shoes, sheets, toothbrushes, etc. for
the orphanage. On the way home we nested the empty bags inside the largest case.
Many of the bags we took for free in 2001 would now require an extra fee of $80
per segment traveled! Don't be afraid to ask people if you can borrow
suitcases. And try and find out what your orphanage needs most. I was amazed at
the outpouring that occurred at our church, a former preschool, and current
school in those short weeks we had to get ready once our approval finally came.
Physical and mental preparation Allow time before you leave for vaccinations. All of our
kids were good sports about this, although Sarah's flu shot did not protect her
from the strain of flu she caught in Bangkok.
In addition, take the time to read Thai stories, learn
about Bangkok (or wherever you are going), peruse a city map, attempt to give
your children a perspective to compare it to where they live (weather,
political system, geography, etc.).
When preparing to travel, we always have our children
prioritize their top three "must see" spots. This practice creates
kids who love to travel, even if circumstances prevent you from seeing
everything but the No. 1 pick for each child. Although we traveled to Hua Hin
twice, most of our planned side trips within Thailand did not happen. Our
children did not mind. For them Bangkok was an exotic and wondrous place. From
our day trip to Ayutthya I am certain they will enjoy future trips to other
regions in Thailand.
Transportation tips
If your existing children attend a preschool or school that has an
annual auction, scan the items for airport transportation. We'd bid on and won
a limo trip to the airport more than a year before we traveled. This meant we
had a way to transport all of those suitcases and I didn't have to worry about
the costs of long-term parking or worry if the taxi would arrive when I wanted.
Once you're in-country, think about the easiest mode of
transportation with multiple children, not the cheapest. If Mark and I had traveled alone we
would have used more local transportation. With four children in tow, we began
with a van (Kwan and Miss Oh's driver and van cost less than our apartment's).
By the end of the trip we had spent a lot of time on Bangkok's SkyTrain
mass-transit system.
Expect the unexpected Realize that the "dream trip" may not be possible
even with extra help. Our trip was not a typical "in and out with your
child in one week." Due to confusion with paperwork, we were in Thailand
as a family for more than 15 days, and I was there an extra week finishing up
Andy's paperwork.
Illness can also foul up your carefully laid plans. Andy
was sick with an ear infection when we first got him. Our first night together
(after a week of orphanage visits) went better than we hoped, but sometime
before dawn Sarah came into our room and began throwing up. Suddenly two of our
four kids were sick. By the end of that day, I was in a taxi taking Sarah to
Bumrungrad Hospital, where she and I spent the next three days while she
battled the flu. Mark mastered the intricacies of the outpatient pediatric area
with Andy's raging ear infection. I marveled at room service menus for
non-patients and enjoyed slipping downstairs for tea at Starbucks when Sarah
was asleep. Santa Claus, along with Thai elves, visited us on Christmas Day.
When the unexpected occurs, "divide and conquer" is an easier
strategy to implement with an extra set of hands -another reason to take a
helper on your trip.
The ultimate benefit Did the trip change our children? You bet! Alexis returned
from Thailand an amazingly compassionate teen far more aware of the world.
Bobby both liked and got tired of people wondering if he was Thai. (His Nepali
hill tribe origins are Tibetan Burmese.) I am certain that his desire to learn
more about Nepal was kindled during that trip. Kwan never tired of Bobby's
questions and willingly taught him Thai words and parts of the Thai alphabet.
Kwan and Miss Oh also got us off the tourist circuit, which meant that Bobby's
brown skin fit in while the rest of us experienced the life that Bobby must
feel on a regular basis. Sarah came to me while we were in Bangkok and said "Andy
only has a little chance to see his birthmother." She held up two fingers
that were so close together they almost met. "Only this much." Then
she thought for a moment. "Not everyone gets to see their birthmother, do
they?" And she seemed at peace with the discovery that not all adopted
children get to meet their birthmothers.
As for Andy, he gained a family...and in a stroke of
brilliance, forever gained the allegiance of his big sister Alexis. When he was
on my lap at the orphanage with Bobby and Sarah eagerly crowding in wanting to
get to know him, he got off my lap and walked over to Alexis and took her hand.
He melted her heart. They are my bookend children...separated by a dozen years
yet so alike.
For us it was worth the extra work, the extra money, the
occasional squabbles, and the jet lag. Jet lag is a very real phenomenon. Mark
and I used to always have an argument on day three of a big trip. We've since
realized that that's when we're our most vulnerable because we think we should
be 100% normal. We now schedule a silly argument before we go-then when we
start to snap on day three, we laugh and say, "We've already had that
argument."
Gwen Shuster-Haynes is mother to Alexis (16), Bobby (9,
adopted from Nepal when he was 21 months old), Sarah (7, adopted from Arizona
two months before her due date) and Andrew Atthapon (4) from Thailand, who
arrived home in Colorado in 2001.
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COMING EVENTS
Family Reunion Susana Huaman Dragosavac, coordinator of
the 2003 Thai Family Reunion in Orlando, has been a very busy person lately
(see "New Arrivals" for details). Nevertheless she's making steady
progress with plans for the event, and advises the group that the dedicated
Website at http://www.thaifamilyreunion.com should be up and running before the
end of November. She welcomes your comments at susanahuaman@usa.net. Save the
dates: July 31 to Aug. 3, 2003, at the Caribe Royal resort in Lake Buena Vista.
ONLINE RESOURCES
**Krathong fun
D-base member Dana Franks sent along a couple of cool Web links for the
making of krathongs (for the traditional November "full moon"
holiday) with banana leaves. These are a nice supplement to the Loy Krathong
holiday guide I sent out last week. Check them out at:
http://www.att.virtualclassroom.org/vc99/vc_34/thai/krathong/krathong.htm
http://www.pattayacity.com/pattaya/loikrathong2000.html
PS - Frozen banana leaves may be available at Asian
grocery stores. Tree sections will take more creativity-Dana was planning on
trying thick slices of a root vegetable like jicama.
**Thailand travel tips Asian Rental Network
has launched a new Website: http://www.ExpatsGuide.com.
The site is geared to those who will be living in or visiting Thailand for
extended periods but is full of information that will also be useful for
adoption visits. The site owners specifically say they wished to create an
alternative to existing Thai travel sites that focus on the sex trade.
**Precocious puberty. D-base member Becky Wyatt has been researching the
phenomenon of precocious puberty in female adoptees who have a rapid growth
spurt after adoption (covered in the Nov. 2001 cyber newsletter). She
recommends the Website http://www.toosoon.com for any families dealing with
this issue. (The site is sponsored by the pharma that makes Lupron and some
other hormone-arresting drugs, but still seems to have some good information.)
**Thai e-shopping
Thai Concept is a mailorder firm offering a variety of handicrafts,
including artwork, fabric, adult clothing (modern, not traditional),
accessories, home dŽcor items, and muay thai items. One of our d-base members
has bought products from the proprietor, "Uncle Jum," on E-bay and
says he offers good service and products. Teens would probably enjoy the
T-shirts featuring tuk-
tuks and Thai beer logos! Visit:
http://www.thaiconcept.com.
**Adoption in the media Celebrate Adoption and the
Inter-national Adoption Alliance have founded a new partnership to help
adoption triad members find timely information about films, TV, and other
entertainment programming with adoption-related themes. The site attempts to
help families determine whether specific films/programs deal with adoption in
an intelligent or derogatory manner. User reviews are welcomed and are being
actively solicited. Visit: http://www.i-a-a.org and click on "Media
Reviews" to submit opinions. To read reviews, visit
http://www.celebrateadoption.org and click on "Media Reviews."
** New adoption video "Perspectives on Adoption: International Adoptees Tell
Their Stories" is a newly released video documentary. Adoptees and their
families candidly discuss such issues as abandonment, growing up in a white
community, adolescence, homeland visits, and coming to terms with being
adopted. The video is available for $29.95 plus $4.95 for shipping/handling. A
portion of the proceeds will be donated to Amity Foundation in support of its
"hugging grannies" program in Chinese orphanages. For information or
to order a VHS video, contact producer Alisa Blum at alisablum@earthlink.com or
503-524-3470. Please mention the Amity donation program when ordering.
** Magazine for multicultural families I recently received a note from the
founders of Culture magazine, a new venture targeted at multicultural families.
They're offering a free premiere issue and asking for input. Take a look:
http://www.culture-magazine.com/
** Diversity-themed products Check out
http://www.imeltingpot.com/index2.htm for diversity-themed T-shirts,
stationery, jewelry, home dŽcor, classroom materials, and more. This might be a
great place to find holiday gifts for certain special people on your list.
** Language acquisition by adoptees The Dept. of
Communication Sciences and Disorders at Towson Univ. in Maryland has an ongoing
project focusing on language acquisition by international adoptees. Coordinator
Dr. Sharon Glennen is a faculty member and adoptive parent of two children from
Russia. Visit the university's Website forsome fascinating and useful
information: http://pages.towson.edu/sglennen/index.htm
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RECIPE EXCHANGE
By popular request, I've established a recipe exchange
for Thai recipes. If you're sending a recipe from a cookbook, please make sure
to credit both the author and the cookbook. Personal notes about your
experiences with the recipes are welcomed and requested. Please send me some
recipes for next time!!!!
Stir-Fried Oyster Mushrooms with Tofu and Baby Corn (het
hoy naengrong phat tao hoo leh khao phod on)
A quick and easy vegetarian entrŽe from Victor Sodsook's
"True Thai." (Italic comments throughout this section are from your
editor.)
3 Tbsp. vegetable oil
10 cloves garlic, mashed
12 oz. firm tofu, cut into bite-sized cubes
2 Tbsp. crushed yellow bean sauce
2 Tbsp. golden brown sugar or palm sugar
8 oz. oyster mushrooms, wiped clean but left whole
(regular mushrooms can also be used)
12 ears canned baby corn (about half a 15-oz. can)
6 scallions, including green tops, angle-cut into 1
1/2-inch pieces, bulbs then cut in half lengthwise
Place all ingredients within easy reach of the cooking
area. Set a wok over medium high heat. Add oil, then garlic, and stir fry
briefly till golden and aromatic. Add tofu and stir-fry for 30 sec. Add bean
sauce and sugar and stir-fry for 30 sec. Add mushrooms, baby corn, and
scallions, and stir fry until the vegetables are cooked through, about 2 min.
Transfer to a serving platter and serve with steamed jasmine rice.
Serves 4 to 6 as part of a Thai meal with 2 or 3 other
dishes.
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Thai-style Crab Cakes
A friend gave me this recipe she had clipped from a
newspaper in 1999, with the original source as the Los Angeles Times Food
Syndicate. I don't think it's strictly Thai, but the essential flavor is there.
A great dish for a dinner party - you form and brown the cakes in advance and
later finish them in the oven, freeing up your stovetop burners for other
dishes.
1/2 pound fresh lump Maine crabmeat, picked over (I have
not tried this with fake crab [surimi] and have always used good-quality
refrigerated canned crabmeat from a local fish market instead. Those of you
lucky folks who live in more coastal environments can probably get good fresh
crabmeat, which is ideal.)
1/2 c. finely diced sweet red pepper (you can augment this with hot Thai
chilies if desired; the finished dish is mild)
1/2 c. finely chopped sweet red onion or (more authentic)
shallots
1/2 c. finely chopped cilantro, including stems
1 1/4 c. Thai sweet chili sauce, divided (this is the
sticky thick kind with a clear sugary base, available in Thai stores in brands
like Mae Ploy and traditionally served with Thai BBQ chicken. Or see the
sub-recipe below to make your own.)
1/4 tsp. salt
1 egg, lightly beaten
1 1/2 to 1 3/4 c. panko bread crumbs, divided (light
Japanese breadcrumbs, commonly available in Asian stores. If you're stuck, you
can use freshly made crumbs from toasted white bread, but the cakes will be
heavier.)
Vegetable oil for sautŽing
4 red leaf or Romaine lettuce leaves for garnish
Place crabmeat in clean kitchen towel or cheesecloth and
gently squeeze out any excess liquid. Place crab in mixing bowl and add red
pepper, onion/shallots, cilantro, 1/4 c. of the sweet chili sauce, salt, and
egg. Mix well. Add 1/2 c. of panko crumbs. If mixture still seems too moist,
add up to 1/4 c. more. Cover bowl with plastic wrap and refrigerate 30 min. or
longer to firm.
When ready to shape crab cakes, remove mixture from
refrigerator and use 1/2 c. capacity measuring cup to portion into 8 cakes.
(Can use a 1/4 c. measure for appetizer sized cakes.) Place remaining panko crumbs on a dinner plate and coat each
cake generously with crumbs.
Add enough oil to coat the bottom of a medium-sized
nonstick skillet and place over medium heat. When oil is very hot, but not
smoking, put 2 or 3 (or more, if small) cakes at a time into the skillet. Press
gently to flatten slightly. Cook until bottoms are golden brown, then turn to
cook until golden brown on the other side. Drain on paper towels and continue
cooking in batches until all cakes have been browned. Transfer to a baking
sheet that's been lined with aluminum foil and greased generously with
vegetable oil. (Best to use a baking sheet with low sides to avoid oil runoff,
rather than a totally flat cookie sheet.) If not serving immediately, cover
with plastic wrap and refrigerate for up to three hours.
When ready to serve, bake on center rack of preheated
450-degree oven until crab cakes are piping hot, about 10 min. Remove from oven
and arrange on plates lined with lettuce leaves. Serve with a bowl of the
remaining sweet chili sauce. (Or prepare individual plates of two cakes each,
with each plate having a sauce cup holding 1/4 cup of sauce.)
Recipe makes 8 entrŽe-sized cakes (serves 4 with two
cakes per entrŽe) or 16 appetizer-sized cakes.
-------
Sweet and Spicy Dipping Sauce (nam jeem kai yang)
A quick recipe for this basic condiment, as a substitute
for commercially bottled brands. From Victor Sodsook's, "True Thai."
Makes about 1 1/2 cups - just about the right amount to be used with the
preceding crab cake recipe.
1/2 c. distilled white vinegar
1 c. white granulated sugar
1/2 tsp. salt
1 Tbsp. Chinese-style chili-garlic sauce, preferably Lee
Kum Kee brand
In a small saucepan, combine the vinegar and 1/2 c. of
the sugar. Bring to a low boil over medium-high heat, stirring occasionally.
Lower the heat to medium and stir in the rest of the sugar. Cook for 2 min.,
stirring frequently as the mixture comes back to a boil. Reduce the heat to low
and add the salt. Simmer for 5 min., stirring occasionally. Stir in the
chili-garlic sauce and remove from the heat. Let cool and serve at room
temperature. (Covered and refrigerated, will keep for about 3 weeks before
beginning to loose its oomph.)
COMMUNITY NOTES
The "Community Notes" section is designed for
news bytes, inquiries, and gossip like the following:
NEW ARRIVALS If you have recently (within the past year)
added a child to your family by birth or by adoption from any country, please
contact me with the child's name, birth date, date of adoptive custody (if
applicable), country adopted from (if applicable), and agency. We'd love to
share your joy!
FINALIZATIONS AND REGISTRATIONS
NEW DATABASE MEMBERS Please welcome the following families to our group:
REQUESTS, REPORTS, AND QUESTIONS FROM THE COMMUNITY
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BOOK RECOMMENDATION - FOR KIDS
We're Different, We're the Same. Bobbi Jane Kates. Elmo
leads the Sesame Street characters in an exploration of all the ways that
people's physical features and feelings may be different, yet highlights how
all people are also alike. A fine toddler/
preschooler introduction to diversity concepts. Makes a
great gift for classrooms, too. ISBN: 0679832270.
BOOK RECOMMENDATION-ADOPTION/PARENTING
Discipline Without Shouting or Spanking: Practical
Solutions to the Most Common Preschool Behavior Problems (revised and expanded
edition). J. Wyckoff and B.C. Unell. Database member Marg Dochoda writes:
"My son had many behavioral issues upon arrival, and Discipline Without
Shouting or Spanking was the most referenced took on my parenting bookshelf.
Frequently, I would grab this little book for a quick read and some practical
suggestions on how to deal with his latest transgression. I have given many
copies over the years to new parents." ISBN: 0743228545
BOOK RECOMMENDATION - THAI CULTURE
Thai: A Complete Course for Beginners (Teach Yourself
Series), David Smyth (book and cassette tapes). Stuck in a long adoption wait,
or planning an upcoming visit to Thailand? I think this is a great, inexpensive
tool for learning a good deal of "tourist" Thai that can be useful in
communicating with non-infant kids as well. The tapes with native speakers
pronouncing key words and phrases are invaluable for getting a feel for Thai
tones and vowel durations. Also contains large amounts of information for those
who actually want to start reading (not just speaking) some Thai. You won't be
ready to work for the State Dept. there when you're through, but you'll be very
ready to buy mangoes and silk shirts from street vendors, and to tell the
waiter you want food that's "not too hot, please!" The people you
meet in Thailand will appreciate your efforts, even if your tones are atrocious
and your grammar is fractured. ISBN: 0844238783.
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SEND QUESTIONS, COMMENTS, ARTICLES, OR IDEAS TO: JULIE
HIGGINBOTHAM (urghiggi@yahoo.com)
Thai adoption Website: http://www.neiu.edu/
~rghiggin/Thaiadopt/start.html (suggestions always
welcome)
Thailandadopt listserv subscription info:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/thailandadopt/join (a
friendly community for waiting families and veterans alike)